A Few Things...

I've been slacking lately and not writing like I usually do, so here's a few of the things going on...

• I went to Disneyland with A, my little one, and A's parents for his step dad's birthday. It was awesome! We went on Pirates twice, Thunder Mountain twice (my girl's favorite), the Haunted House, Space Mountain, and over in CA. Adventure we went on Ca. Screamin, and Soarin Over Ca. We also ate at the restaurant inside of Pirates which was very special. I've dreamed of eating there since I was a little girl and finally got to go!

• I have been recuperating ever since. For some reason waking up at 6AM on Sat. and being up till 1:30 AM Sun. morning threw me all off. I have been achy and exhausted ever since. I'm hoping that the new Aryevedic vitamins I got today (recommended to me by my friend & expert herbologist, massage therapist, & aromatherapist Heather - see http://morninggloryessentials.com ) will help get my energy back up. It took 2 days for my calves to stop hurting from walking and standing in lines all day long. But it was worth it:)

• I've been incredibly crabby and irratable since Saturday's all day Mickey Mouse adventure. I don't know if it was just the fatigue or what but I have been on edge, grumpy, and impatient for the last few days. And it's not even PMS time. The only thing I did to try and excuse myself for the terrible mood I was in was to at least fess up to my girl that I was crabby and tired in hopes that she'd let my snippy remarks and impatient attitude slide. She did. The little darling.

• I had therapy with the Ex. and it was long and drawn out and all about the friggin cell phone I purchased for our daughter that he never agreed to and I let her use it and it ended up at his house and was somehow accidently lost. By the end of it I was getting pretty upset especially when I asked him to pay for part of the last few months it'd been "misplaced" & he started talking about how they pay for her Dr. visits and healthcare and they never gripe or ask for money from me. That's right because I went 5 years without getting a dime from him for child support or any expenses which consisted of preschool, doctor and dentist visits, clothes, baby sitters, and anything and everything that children require! I lost it in the session and said I couldn't listen to him anymore, and why was he bringing up all the things they pay for? What's his point exactly because if it's that the financial responsibilities have not been fair over the past year, then I'd like to say how un-fair they have been for the 5 years prior to this past year! And how I have paid for everything and had to beg my parents for money to pay my utilies or to even buy groceries! Okay - a little venting here... but then our time was up and we didn't really resolve anything, except he did finally say he'd pay half of the cell phone bill and would make a point to look for it. Fancy that.

• This morning when I dropped my cutie off at her dad's apartment, he met us in the driveway with the cell phone in hand. Hmm... funny how it suddenly wasn't so hard to locate after all.

• Today I am getting ticked off at A for no real apparent reason. And I did mention that it's NOT PMS time right? Well last week we had a good talk about some of our issues that haven't really been settled yet, and it went really well. Then we just went on with our lives as usual and suddenly today "as usual" is not enough. Our talk went well and I think we both left feeling like we'd accomplished something and we'd been proactive & constructive in our resolving techniques. So why am I disgruntled again and why isn't normal okay with me? I've been in relationships full of passion, but also full of drama, and the bad kind. Do I just miss the drama, and is the drama what created the intensity and therefore the passion?

• I had weird dreams last night, my boss was in it, at some point A was in it, it turned sexual but I'm not sure with who. I'm sure it must have been A because I definitely admire my boss but definitely don't feel anything in the sexual way towards him (I mean he's married and he's like a big brother or cousin or something). Then there's some fuzzy parts in the dream & it seemed to have gone awry and I woke up with a feeling of confusion and dis-satisfaction.

• One last thing - and hopefully a good thing (I'll have to let you know next week)... A and I are going on our weekend trip to Cambria Friday. Check it out - http://www.seaviewonburton.com/index.html I'm sooooo excited! Our first real adult weekend away! Woohoo!

I'll return next week hopefully with less crabbiness and some good stories on our "relaxed, wine and strawberries waiting for us in the bedroom, indulgent, no kids or family members" weekend. I said some stories - meaning I'll edit out the really good ones:)

LoLo